I Think We've all Learned a Valuable Lesson...

... If you're ever cursed, hit a kid in the mouth with a fly ball. And get some pitching.

"1903, 1912, 1915, 1916, 1918, 2004"

Well, I guess some curses are supposed to be broken. Over the past week, I've had a lot of people get mad at me for saying that the Sox can't win the Series. Not to call anyone out, but Aaron Hickman was the worst, followed by Rob Blackwood.

I guess in touting tradition and superstition I left out maybe the greatest baseball tradition ever: rooting for the underdog. I don't mean this year's underdog, although the Cards did boast a better record this season, I mean the ultimate underdog of all time. The fact that the BoSox pulled it off is a century-long Cinderella story, and after so long, they deserve it.

Now, I wouldn't call myself a Boston fan, per se, unless they're playing the Spawn of Satan, but it is wicked cool that they won this year so decicively, and it's good to see the underdog pull it off.

The Bleak, Bleak Future

Now Johnny Damon can cut his hair, Fenway can have a date to follow the comma, and we can stop feeling sorry for Boston. Of course, as I predicted, the 86 year-old loser-driven economy of Boston will collapse, BoSox fans won't have to live from year to year praying to break the curse, and Game Seven won't mean quite as much.

With nothing to live for, Boston will probably descend into chaos. With no direction or common goal (for baseball fans, the Pats may keep the pigskin fans occupied for now), I wouldn't be surprised to see riots and protests, perhaps widespread killings. Of course, once the violence subsides, Bostonians will move from anger to depression and Boston's collective will to go on will die. The Sox won the Series, what is there to keep them going? No curse to break, no Yankees to fear, no comma to follow up on, what is there?

Of course, with this curse broken, only the Billy Goat Curse on the Cubs remains. With the Sox breaking the second-longest World Series curse, can the Cubs be far behind. I hope so. But perhaps a new era has dawned in the American League. If the Sox can win, why not the Devil Rays? Or even (dear God please!) the Orioles?

For all to remain right with baseball, we're going to have to find a new curse for the Sox. Someone needs to get them to trade Manny Ramirez or Pedro or someone, prefferably to Baltimore. I'd gladly curse the Sox for another 86 years of depressing losses for the Sox and 26 World championships for the Birds.

Impossible you say? I don't know. The O's have some nearby competiton for TV time , radio coverage and attendence with the Expos moving to DC, so maybe Peter Angelos (the spiritual cousin of the Yankees) will spend some cash and get some pitching, and hopefully curse someone in the process.

Regardless, the Curse of the Bambino is over, and I'm glad I lived to see it. Like I said, it's good to see the underdog win sometimes and when you've been the underdog for 86 years and you win eight straight in the playoff, that's great baseball.

But for those of us who are curse fans (me and, not counting the Bambino Curse, Aaron Hickman), we still have the Cubbies to root against.

And so far as next year goes... Anything's possible.