And I Never Went to a Single HFStival...

I would like to announce the passing of a true friend, a mentor, guide and confidant during the rough years of my teenage life: WHFS 99.1. Today at noon WHFS signed off the air and has been replaced by Spanish language station: "El Zol."

The King is dead, long live El Rey

While Traviis Ervin and other Hispanics will rejoice, the junkies and wanna be rockers of the nation's capitol are left to pick up the pieces and search for crappy angst-filled "alternative" music elsewhere. Thanks to WHFS, many of the teenagers in the Baltimore-Washington area learned about drugs, sex and hating their parents. Thanks to WHFS, the annual HFStival became a place where men owning giant inflatable genitals could roam unharassed and pesky laws concerning recreational drug use and restricting the legal age for drinking alcohol could be ignored. I'm disappointed that I never went to a single one. Seriously, I'm heartbroken. WHFS helped cheapen the meaning of "alternative" by making it mainstream, which was the goal of the Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan and Nirvana all along.

A triumphant Bjork celebrates Tibetian independence, all thanks to a little rock n' roll

Thanks to WHFS, the Chinese provice of Tibet is now free and independent. The Dalai Lama and Jane's Addiction have both thanked the legions of uninformed politically apathetic attendants of the Tibetian Freedom Concert for helping to soften the heart of the brutal Chinese regime. Who knew that the dictatorial government of the world's most populous country could be swayed by a bunch of American rockers?

At least, that's what could have happened.

Instead, the happy, easy to dance to, upbeat sounds of Latin music from the Caribbean and Central America will fill the airwaves with their infectious brand of uplifting music about love and enjoying life. What will the Linkin Park-starved haters of the establishment do, now that their establishment is fallen?

Only time will tell. But at least there's still Hot Topic, where "It's all about the music."

Hispanic Rebel Leader Che Guevara smokes a cigar of victory at the demise of WHFS

The victorious leaders of the El Zol guerrillas march through Washington, DC in triumph

For more reading, check out:

http://www.radioandrecords.com/Newsroom/2005_01_12/topstory.asp